I remember when she was first born. After we came home from the hospital and the family members had gone home...those first few days were such distant memories. I remember telling Justin "when are they gonna come back to get her". It felt like I was babysitting someone elses baby. Of course I felt like I was her mother, I held her, loved her, kissed her...I couldn't get enough of her, still can't. I cherish every noise she made...even the ones that freak me out and kept me awake in the middle of the night. I even cherish the noises she didn't make...you know, the one that makes you panic and your first thought is that she stopped breathing so you go to check on her. After a few weeks of a half sleeping state, I decided it was time for my baby to sleep in bed with me. For 2-3 months of her life...she slept on my chest every night. I held her tight and I thank God for giving me the most precious gift. It was all so surreal.
I remember her first smile...so she was only 2 weeks old and it wasn't a voluntary smile, she still smiled. The first time she held her head up while she was on her belly. Her first laugh, the first time she went to the park. The first time she sat up alone. I remember when she learned how to crawl, stand and walk. Her first word..sweet precious sounds she makes. I remember it all and yet it seems to have gone by so fast. I wish I had more time to take in the first 6 months of her life. Between feedings, laundry, diaper changes, baths and naps (for her not me)...it all passed by so fast.
I can remember my life before she was even concieved, yet I can't imagine a day without her ever again.
I can only sum up what I am feeling with this song...
Click play below
In My Daughter's Eyes - Martina McBride
In my daughter's eyes I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see
She was sent to rescue me
I see who I wanna be
In my daughter's eyes
In my daughter's eyes everyone is equal
Darkness turns to light and the
world is at peace
This miracle God gave to me gives me
strength when I am weak
I find reason to believe
In my daughter's eyes
And when she wraps her hand
around my finger
Oh it puts a smile in my heart
Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about
It's hangin' on when your heart
has had enough
It's giving more when you feel like giving up
I've seen the light
It's in my daughter's eyes
In my daughter's eyes I can see the future
A reflection of who I am and what will be
Though she'll grow and someday leave
Maybe raise a family
When I'm gone I hope you see how happy
she made me
For I'll be there
In my daughter's eyes
6 comments:
You brought me to tears...well said Mama.
Katie
Thanks Katie...I am so glad our babies were born a day apart. I have someone who knows exactly what I am feeling.
Thank you Justin...I know it is going to be a bittersweet day for us.
Angela, that was a beautiful post. It's amazing how these little ones can take over so much of our hearts and emotions. It does just go too fast. I've been sitting here bawling and blubbering to Katie b/c of this. Thanks a lot! ;-)
Hi! isn't it amazing how you can't wait to see them as they grow, but you don't want them to grow up? And you never ever want to put them down? I too would check the whole breathing thing LOL! What a beautiful post...And those pics are gorgeous! So many good ones! hugs!~mama
That was a beautiful post.
Thanks Cassy, Mama and Holli. I know I am going to be in a funk in a few days. Just the sheer thought of her birthday...I am happy and sad all at the same time.
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